BLOG: MIA

Hello Friends and Family!  Well, where has the time gone?!  My last post was October 15th.... It's March 19th...  I hate that I let this thing fall off the face of the Earth again!

A lot of things were happening when I left Poop and Hiccups last... My sweet Annie dog had just had a little incident that left her unable to use her back legs.  :(  The vet so graciously offered to keep her free of charge for as long as it took to get her back together.  He really believes that she will be able to use her legs again, with time and healing!  After Annie's accident, I wrote a long, long post about this sweet dog - almost a little obituary for her.... Well, she's still very much alive and I have that post just saved in the dashboard of my blog.  Something about that unpublished post has kept me away from the blog.

Almost a week ago, I got to attend the Women in Ag conference in Marshall and listened to Jolene Brown speak and share stories and humor of life on the farm.  She said you always need to find the humor in things!  I scribbled on my little note pad "Write more.  BLOG!"  I knew I HAD to get back to this.  Finding the humor in the craziness that is life is so important and I'm going to forget it all if I don't get back to sharing these stories! 

So.  Here I am!  Hopefully I can take the time to sit down and share the funny stories of our crazy, beautiful life!

Now, let's see if I can remember some stories that I've missed.....

Here are a few nuggets I found thanks to the always available Facebook...

"Just picked up a small brown crumb-looking item off the living room floor and smelled it to make sure it wasn't poop.... Sometimes you just can't trust Charlie! ‪#‎tmi‬ ‪#‎momproblems‬ ‪#‎poophappens "

"Seth called and said he finally found a good use for the chain link fence. I knew exactly what I was going to find back there.... the bottle calf. I actually enjoy it and it's a great experience for the kids! Wyatt wants to bring it in the house.... :| "  - This was an interesting little moment in time.  We had a bottle calf in our backyard.  We all enjoyed the experience until it became clear that the calf was only pooping on the deck or the sidewalk... And it was starting to scratch the deck.  It has since been relocated to the comfort of the barn.

"What is this "tax refund" everyone speaks of.....? ‪#‎farmlife "

"Lovely little family night in the barn. Then Wyatt says 'I didn't know you could throw hay so far, Dad!' 'Hey, Mom, guess what I have...? Hay in my pockets...!' "

"Mom, I love you." "I love you, too, Wyatt...!" "But I don't like the girls in my class because they're too girly..."

"Our Valentine's Day tradition.... heart-shaped meatloaf...  I hope my boys remember this forever and end up wanting their wives to do this for them because that's what their mom always did.... "

"My kids haven't officially been weighed in for their 4 and 2 year check-ups.... (I know, I'm slacking...) but I feel like they're huge! According to our scale, Wyatt and Charlie weigh in at 42 and 36 pounds, respectively... Wyatt wears a 4 snuggly... Charlie wears a 2 or 3.... These boys are so awesome. They make me smile and melt my heart every single day.... They also infuriate me nearly every day.... but hey, such is life. And I cannot imagine it without them. ‪#‎proudmomma‬ ‪#‎sappymomma‬ All that's missing here is an adorable photo.... I'll share one soon"

"Ummmm, yikes..? Just found this in Wyatt's take home folder from school.... I'm a little surprised I didn't get pulled aside and asked about this. In case you can't see it - "It's a firepit hospital... it burns people". ‪#‎creepythingskidssay "

"'Uh-Oh!! Hey Mommmma! Sponge-sposby's on!!!'  Spongebobby isn't allowed in the Tyre House. Charlie knows the rules..."

"Hello! My name is Lindsey and I'm turning 30 in a few days. I went to Vegas and all I bought was this big drink and insoles for my high arches.... ‪#‎imgettingold‬ ‪#‎gobigorgohome‬ ‪#‎vegas "

"'Hey mom... can I have some juice..?'  'What kind of juice do you want..?'  'Whatever kind of juice that makes poop come out.'  Hahahah. Maybe he's a little bound up... ‪#‎fouryearolds "

"My good ol' husband is working today - he says it's the first day of the year, you have to do what you're going to do all year. If that's the case, I'll be cleaning the house and picking up toys while diffusing petty toy sharing arguments all year. I guess that'll do... :)  ‪#‎happynewyear "

"Little moments that make our hearts so happy... Tonight we were about to pray at dinner and Wyatt asked if he could say his prayer first - of course! "Come Lord Jesus be our guest and let these gifts to us be blessed. All my exes live in Texas. Texas is the place I really love to be." Nothing like singing a little song to wrap it up. This boy..... "

"Wyatt is full of it this morning. The other day I gave him a carrot and told him it was good for his eyes so he needed to eat it. Last night, we had cooked carrots out of our roast - of which he wasn't so much a fan. This morning he came right up to me and said "Coooooked carrots, aren't good for your eyes.... NOT cooked carrots, are......." He also told me he wanted me to start growing his baby sister in my belly. I told him to go tell his daddy.  Haha!"

Well I think that about wraps it up!  I'll try to do better...... :) ‬

Poop and Doctors.

Patience is a virtue.

What does that even mean?...!

I know I say it several times in response to working on trying to raise these two boys and maintain my sanity while also trying to be somewhat involved in the community...  Be prepared, I have already decided to have an entire blog post dedicated to this concept of patience.  Another day.

Today we went to the doctor for Charlie's 18 month well-child check.  I intended on Wyatt staying home because I don't want to take a kid who doesn't need to be at the doctor to the doctor.  This wasn't an option today so the three of us loaded up and headed to town.  I expected a relatively simple visit - I was told no shots.  Though I thought there might be a finger prick for lead testing.

While in the dreaded toy area of the office (I'm a germaphobe.. I know this...) Wyatt asked me if there was a bathroom here.  Blast... I didn't make him go before we left home.  I told him yes, and if he could hold it for a bit, we would go while we waited for the doctor back in the room.  Not long after, it was obvious we didn't have that time to wait.

Real life interjection - I just had to go pull Charlie out of my toilet.... What is the obsession there...?  I should know better than trying to blog a little while the boys are still awake... Moving on.

We found the restroom and I picked Wyatt up so he could dangle himself into the toilet to pee.  "No, Mom! I've got to go poop!"  Sigh........ "Okay."

We returned to the dreaded toy area after we wrapped up the potty break.  Five minutes later we were still waiting and a familiar smell begin to fill the dreaded toy area.  Charlie pooped.  Two boys.  Two poops.  Naturally.  I found a spot to change Charles and we were set.

Shortly after, we were escorted to our room and met with the doctor.  This was a bit chaotic.  Both boys trying to climb onto the exam table, crinkling paper, rabbling loudly, arguing over who gets which tractor.  Charlie looks great - developmentally wonderful.  Throat looks beautiful - clear of strep throat.  Ears - red, infected.  Scoff.  Okay. 

Thinking we are nearly done, the doctor asks me if I have interest in the Hepatitis A vaccine.  He recommends it now - schools don't require it but that may be coming.  Now is the perfect time to vaccinate Charlie since we are six months before his next check-up and round of vaccines.  I asked if Wyatt had this because I didn't remember him having a shot at 18 months.  No, he hadn't, but he could be vaccinated at any time.  "Let's do it.  Both of them."

As soon as Wyatt heard he'd be having a shot - it hit the fan.  "I don't want to take a shot! I don't want to take a shot!  I don't want to take a shot!" 

:)  This was hysterical to me.  Any passerby must have thought I was forcing alcohol down my child's throat to get us through this appointment.

Boy did Wyatt get the short end of the stick.  He wasn't even supposed to come to the doctor today.  I told him they weren't going to do anything to him.  And bam.  Before we knew it, he was being held down, screaming from deep within him, with a needle stuck in his strong, worker-man leg.  He was beside himself.  The last time we got a shot (flu shot) he didn't even make a peep.  No tears.  Nothing.  He's much more aware of what's happening every day. 

Charlie made it through his shot with the same scenario.  Momma needed more arms to comfort her betrayed boys.  Wyatt walked down the hallway at the doctor's office, crying the whole way.  We grabbed our sucker "party favors" and out we went.  Smirks and giggles from far more experienced parents in the waiting room serenaded us as we walked out to this beautiful July day.

We headed out to drop off our recycling - which I AM LOVING doing, by the way!  Wyatt is so interested in it and it's really cut down on our trash and back porch clutter. 

Then we headed to the Y for Wyatt's swim lesson.  I had thought of cancelling since I wasn't sure what would happen at the doctor or how it would work out time wise but I'm glad we went.  Charlie and I went swimming also.  Wyatt has made so much progress and can swim pretty well with just his back float.  We are working on head in the water - he just is not a fan of that and his stubbornness that he comes by so honestly is very apparent as he explains to the teacher why he shouldn't have to stick his head in the water. 

Here we are - nearly six hours after our morning adventures began.  God was in my heart this morning - he kept me more patient that I normally would be with poop, shots and screaming children.  Patience is a virtue.


Additional note:
I have so many friends who have more serious struggles - medically, financially -  with their children.  Please do not read this blog and hear the complaints of a mom who really shouldn't be complaining.  I know it's easy to get caught up in the situations that aren't ideal and are somewhat challenging.  I get caught up.  I get dramatic.  I pity myself.  But I also try to find the time to check myself and realize how fortunate we are as a family.  My boys are healthy.  There isn't much that we have to go without.. I just use this blog as a way to share the times that I encounter with my boys and hope some can relate.  I know several others who could write a much more intense take on motherhood and life.  This is just mine.

Flashlights. Damn.

Several weeks ago, Wyatt and Seth had to weather a nasty storm in the cellar.  Charlie and I were safe in the hospital dealing with his bronchiolitis.  Wyatt definitely made some memories while being in the cellar with his Daddy and has been quick to share many of the details with anyone that crosses his path.

One day, shortly after the storm, Wyatt and Seth were in Casey's and bumped into some local farmer friends.  Wyatt began telling his version of the events in the cellar.  He explained to one farmer that the batteries in their flashlight were dead.  The farmer asked Wyatt, "What do you say when your batteries die in your flashlight?"  I'm not sure that Wyatt had an answer, but the farmer did.  The farmer told Wyatt, "I always say 'Damnit' when the batteries in my flashlight die."

Thanks, Farmer. 

Though, "fortunately", Wyatt already knew the word.... Apparently he learned it from his momma....

A few days later, Wyatt and Seth were in Casey's again and bumped into the same farmer friend.  This time, the farmer gave Wyatt his very own flashlight.  He informed Wyatt, "This is your damnit flashlight."

Why.... Farmer?  Why....?

This was a novelty for quite some time.  Wyatt kept his "damnit flashlight" in the shed and told every visitor that this was his "damnit flashlight".

Fast forward several weeks to a beautiful Sunday morning in church - Pentecost.  We had a guest pastor who was also in charge of the children's time that Wyatt always attends at the front of the church in the middle of the service.

I should add - this guest pastor isn't just any guest in the church.  He is a very treasured part of our church who has been there often and actually baptized Wyatt.

The guest pastor pulled out a flashlight.

Seth and I exchanged nervous glances.

The pastor asked the kids what it was he was holding.  The kids were quiet for a few seconds until Wyatt - one of the youngest in the bunch - chimed in "a flashlight".

Whew..... Just a flashlight.

The pastor continued his children's sermon by demonstrating that the flashlight didn't work because it was out of batteries.

...............

Seth and I exchanged nervous glances and giggles.  Oh. My. Goodness... Please, Wyatt... Don't. Talk.

Wyatt got chatty today at children's time and started sharing some of his experience with cellars and flashlights and explained that our cellar is dark and Daddy's flashlight ran out of batteries.  He then asked the pastor if he could have that flashlight in case we needed to go into the cellar again.

Amazingly, Wyatt didn't drop a damnit in church today.  But there couldn't have been a more perfect opportunity for him to share his colorful farmer language with the entire congregation.

Seth and I sat and giggled nervously through most of the children's sermon while several members of the congregation kept smiling at us while they heard Wyatt's take on the cellar/flashlight experience.

Maybe this kid has a filter and knows it should be applied at church.

Damn flashlights.